#latepost
Something caught my eyes when I scrolled down my Facebook timeline the other day. “Shah Rukh Khan and Dr. Zakir Naik – a Live Dialogue on Muslims’ Identity” – wow, two significant icons in their respective industries met on the same stage to talk about Islam? Interesting.
It’s an old video from 2010 I think but I don’t know why it has just gone viral lately and reached me this time.
We all know that Shah Rukh Khan (SRK) is a Muslim-born but obviously not potraying the identity as a Muslim (sorry) or more of what he said, practicing it ‘in his own way’, so the dialogue was about questioning his stance, debating on Muslim characters in their film industry and so forth.
Well, I’m not gonna comment on the discussion by the highly respectable scholar and other panels of what they talked about (I did not watch everything anyway). Only this snippet of what SRK said turned out to be phenomenal to me. He said;
“In my actual life, I truly believe that it is, my religion is justifying me. Most certainly I’m proud to be a Muslim. But I, what people would say, I am an easier-going muslim. I’m a moderate Muslim.” – Shah Rukh Khan
The above were exactly the words uttered by SRK that struck me out of the blue till I repeated them again and again.
Easier Going Muslim
Easier. Going. Muslim.
Easier Going Muslim?
Is there such a term??!
Is that a category in the religion categorizing the believers according to their faith?
Speechless. Speechless.
And keep repeating them. And continued.
And the next seconds left me even more speechlessss…
At first the audience were seriously listening to him. But right after he said that particular thing in hesitation, everyone was like, grinninggg – hehehehe. I could hear them laughing at him! Or they chuckled a little laa but hey. What an awkward moment. They found it funny so they laughed! They laughed at the term Easier Going Muslim?! Was the statement like a punchline??
Oh my God, I don’t know why. I was like… Ya Allah. I was left puzzled for days thinking of such a scene I just watched. I was so triggered it haunted me like a mystic!
Something is wrong. I tried to figure out myself what is an easier-going Muslim, actually? Why does it sound so weird… I came out with a few definitions :
~ Basically it sounds like, someone who is Muslim, admitted that s/he is, but is taking it easy on many things from the religion. Okay.
~ Someone who is Muslim, practices the religion but doesn’t really or totally understand what s/he is actually practicing and why. Aha…
~ Someone who is Muslim, understands the religion on what and how s/he should practice, but doesn’t really (want to) practice it accordingly. Erk..
~ Someone who knows there’s a lot more things in the religion s/he should learn about, but just doesn’t bother to find out. Hurm…
Opps. Suddenly I got startled!
Wait wait wait… Rasa macam… Itu semua macam aku je?
Hahhh?! Gosh…I think those things are also ME.
Am I that Easier Going Muslim??
Haaa……… *silentmo*
Astaghfirullahalazim. I suddenly felt so embarrassed. Awkward. I felt like I was also laughed at by the audience! What a shame…
I. am. also. an. Easier. Going. Muslim….
.
.
.
.
……………………Sobbed.
That was the moment. The moment I began to feel wrong with myself, my life, my identity and with the religion in me.
I felt lost so I tried to write to comprehend things but I was all at sea. That’s why this post was hanging for long. Now that when I think of it again, maybe it was the beginning of a journey that brings me to whom I am today. A journey that has changed my life in some way or another, a little different in spirit, from yesterday.
It’s a slow journey but I guess, and hope, that it’s heading somewhere..
May Allah guide us all.
As ever,
SALZY
(2017 & 2021)
Salzy Mommyhood 